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Confusing wings

 I look at mirror 
Somedays i look pretty
Is there a mirror to look through me?
If there was a mirror to see one's heart
Somedays mine would be ugly


Because i laugh too loud, threaten everyone around
Yet with so much noise
Can't express my friendship 
I joke when i shouldn't
I joke when noone is doing so
And when joking is everyone's cue
Serious talk takes me through

I confuse myself with own's action
What i say, what i do, what i feel and worse are the viewer's reaction
Lol, but i am doing anything but laughing
"Were you awake all night? Hahaha lol"
But i wasnt being apathetic

So hard to explain, i am not an ignorant
So much it means, the relation of good friendship
I can't explain either, i am an ignorant
At times i don't reply because thats my condition
A condition of wanting to be alone
When cloistered are your emotions
I can't explain that i am not an ignorant

Forgive me friend, i hurt you too many times
Weird is this girl, driven by crazier madness
Can't xplain to you what i mean when i  say it
Nor can i explain what i don't mean when i say it

I pray you see past my flaws
Cherish our memories and moments
Count me amongst your dear friends
See through my dark ugly beautiful heart's reflection

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