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Memories of a beating heart

Could write books on memories
Couldn't we?
But there our brain is
Erasing events, erasing embarrassments
So some we cherish, some we forget
Happy moments, heartbreaking moments
lonely moments, sociable moments
Some we cherish some we forget

Fights and fights,
Laughs and Laughs
Yelling and Crying
Cursing and Missing
Acceptance and Rejection
Complexity and Confusion

And different expectations

Needing space, needing compassion
Two opposite poles or two sides of coin?
Misunderstandings and regrets
Overthinking and accusing
Upset faces, anger and disappointment 

I miss you but this ends here
Want no pilot knocking my door
Taking control of my life
It’s already driven by my fears
Fears of failure 
Fears of my mother
Fears of judgemental society
Fears of unknown

Memories is all I have now
And I miss you
But this has to be the end
And I miss you
Although it not upto you to accept


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Days of life

Lifeless am i? Laying down On my bed I cant move I can see I cant hear Thoughts have conjested A cup of tea i ask Nd a bed to sleep And let me live in peace 12 inch washing tub Placed in my bedroom  I have shame but had no washroom So let me live in peace So the other day i text ya know? My bunch of people I tell em am tensed got some problem at work Ya know they were tensed equally? Alas not a lil trace of it for me , shoot. Why are you scared? Did you do something wrong? Am only human, too much on my mind, you only add to my pain Oh my mother don't know But she has nothing to worry about She asks me to help her But i cant move a feet She is tired of physical pain I am tired of my thoughts At nights i awoke, there was a fight i had to win Asked for help And now the enemy is butchering me My body lies in my bed Lifeless I cant move a feet I can only see My heart is so heavy Weaving thoughts and we

My Lucid Dream

I want to spread my arms As wide as i can Close my  eyes  Shut everything off And let myself go Fall so deep And as i fall I want to fly  As high as i can go Live my dream Feel the excitement of flying No more as a dream No more so real yet so dreamy feel The clear blue sky above me And oh so far the land is I rest then upon the green grass ground See the beautiful white clouds Like a hot air balloon In the sky I see the beautiful mountains Oh so beautiful they are As i am flying  Only my eyes and memories have them captured My eyes open I am in my bed But i cant let go of my dream So i wana spread my arms As wide as i can Shut my eyes off And let myself go Fall deep  Fall so deep  And as i almost touch the ground I will find my wings....

A strange friendship

Lately I haven't been a morning person. Well who am i kidding i have never been a morning person. Anyways, today i had to visit a temple nearby because my mom wanted me to. So in my own time i went there. I organized my puja thali. And when i was doing so I noticed a little girl who was looking at what i was doing fascinatingly. There was this goat as well who was also fascinated by some flowers and a raddish i had in my thali.  I started doing my puja, fully aware the goat was eyeing my puja thali.  In our culture we first offer puja to lord ganesh. Only then we offer puja to other gods. After doing the same, offering my puja to lord ganesh,i went inside the main temple of Bhairav. She tagged along and later i realized so did the goat.  The goat was disturbing  in a cute way. And the lil girl forcefully offered her help by holiding my thali for me. While i was kneeling down and doing my worship, she was making offerings from the thali herself.  And our bond started. The tem